Injustice in Fort Wayne

If you know me, you probably know that February is my least favorite month of the year.  It contains 3 family birthdays including my own (4 if you count pets), but it also contains Valentine's Day, a day that, no matter your relationship situation, sucks.  Either you're single and depressed or you're with someone and pressured to do something involving the color pink and flowers.  Also, it's usually gray, foggy and teases you with glimpses of the spring to come before pelting you with more inclement weather thanks to that goddamn groundhog.*

If you know me really well, you know that this February has been particularly unlucky, what with dog attacks, plumbing issues and my debt card being finicky.  This blog is not about any of that... we'll wait until March 1st to do an anti-February edition (because it's not over yet, it might hear me...).  No, today's post is about something I feel is an important, serious, meaningful... dah, just kidding, it's just funny.

Fort Wayne, Indiana recently held an internet voting contest to name their new government center.  The winning vote, with more than 23,000 votes (more than ten times the votes of the next contender), is being contested by the local government officials.  The name chosen is that of Fort Wayne's 24th mayor, who served his city with distinction from 1934-1947 and a non consecutive term from 1951 until his untimely death in 1954 of a kidney infection at the age of 67.

By all accounts, this man was a great leader and did much for the city of Fort Wayne, including breaking ground on Baer Field, now the current site of Fort Wayne International Airport**, directing war material drives throughout WWII, upgrading his citizen's living conditions and opening up northern parts of the city to improvement by getting the Nickel Plate Railroad to run in that part of town.  Truly a public servant, this man already has a street named after him in Fort Wayne.  Why then are local officials refusing to put his name on a new government center?  Possibly because of his name.

Harry Baals.

Read it again.  Harry.  Baals.

No, I'm not making this up. Harry William Baals, Fort Wayne's 24th mayor, namesake of H.W. Baals Drive is being blocked by local officials who do not think a man who gave so much to the city of Fort Wayne deserves a government center to be named after him.

What message does this send to other amusingly named citizens of this great country?  That you can be a public servant, serve your city/county/state/country well, die in office but if your name makes the general populace chuckle*** you won't be given the honors you rightly deserve?  Is this fair?!

I make this stand for decency not just for the memory of Harry Baals, but also for all the upcoming politicians with amusing names across this country that may, one day, find themselves in a similar predicament.  People like John A. Boehner (Speaker of the House and by all acounts, a stand up guy, rigid in his beliefs, a solid Republican), Richard "Dick" Swett (Former New Hampshire representative), Monica G. Moorehead (Sounds like a James Bond character, but whatever.  And before you ask the G stands for Gail, not Gives, but how awesome would that be?), Young Boozer (Currently the incumbent for the position of Alabama State Treasurer, so no surprise there), Krystal Ball (Yeah.  That's her name.  Deal with it.) and, of course, the dual ticket of George BUSH and DICK Cheney.

Join me in the fight to get hairy balls... I mean Harry Baals his rightful place, emblazoned in huge letters on the Fort Wayne Government Center... then laugh at it with me later on.  As a note, I think any of these names would be fantastic names to have.  JUST NOT IN ELECTED OFFICIALS.

That is all.

* Bill Murray and I are going to get a truck next year and kidnap that little fucker.  We're coming for you, Phil... Count on it.
** Which reminds me, Boise has an international airport?  What the hell man?  You can't call yourself that if you're just going to Canada and Mexico.  That's Boise Intercontinental Airport.  You've at least got to go to Europe or South America directly to get that title.
*** Or, in my case, laugh uproariously for a solid 10 minutes.